When can i go home i am really tired

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
i-am-an-adult-i-swear
liketheghost

so is it a thing in (american) english to use “texas” as a word for like, something that’s out of control or chaotic, or as like, “crazy”? like “that party last weekend was totally texas!”

because that is a thing people say in norwegian and i just think it’s important for americans to know that?

galesofnovember

this is the best thing I’ve ever heard

minnielikes

i’m sorry wHAT

copperbadge

This is like the time I found out that in Israel “Ma po ze, Chicago?” (What is this, CHICAGO?) is a saying for when people are acting unruly. 

perilegs

in finland if something is far away or in an unknown place we can say that “se on huitsin nevadassa” (it’s in nevada) you can also politely tell that you’d wish someone to fuck off by wishing that they’d go to nevada

what-even-is-thiss

It’s good to know that other languages do the “pardon my French” thing.

i-am-an-adult-i-swear
somecunttookmyurl

idk how this "prev tags" nonsense got started but i promise you i am not following a breadcrumb trail to find out what those tags were. if they're that funny then share them with the class in a reblog like a normal clown this isn't twitter

ezhilmozhi

There are angry Tumblr users screaming their tags were stolen. I have been here for a fricking DECADE and this is the first time I've had to say #notmytags. #notmypost.

This is a big reason for Tumblr reblogs falling. Twitter, instagram users migrants think REBLOGS ARE SAME AS REPOSTING. THAT USING OG TAGS IS STEALING.

somecunttookmyurl

wow can't believe i just made this meme and already got to use it twice

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somecunttookmyurl

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we talk in the tags and then the tags go to peer review and if they're deemed Good Content somebody ELSE will put them in a reblog and publish them

replies also go to peer review and get added to the main post if they pass the board

ellynneversweet

image

How could you leave this in the tags, etc.

i-am-an-adult-i-swear
bitchynative

eeby

Why did you pull me over? Audio Transcript

Shut the fuck up when cops ask questions! The script. These 25 words we’re talking about.
To begin with, let’s talk about: what you do when that cop first comes up to you, and no matter what he says:
Where are you going, where are you coming from, what’s that smell, how many drinks have you had, you know this is a high drug traffic area. Why are you sweating? Why are your eyes red? Why do you seem nervous?
Those cops can ask anything they want and when they first come up on you, you wanna say “why did you pull me over?”
That’s the first phrase of the script because under case law, the cops have about 7-8 minutes to give you a traffic ticket unless they find other independent probable cause to further detain you. And they find that when you start yapping.
Now, just cause they pulled you over, doesn’t mean it’s a traffic stop. Maybe your tires are low or something else is wrong.
So, “why did you pull me over?” starts the clock ticking, and that’s your tip of the day. And shut the fuck up when cops ask questions.
piecesofbird

the answer to “do you know why I pulled you over?” is also “why did you pull me over?”